Since BOAT CRIME is a sovereign nation and all of you are visitors to this strange watery realm, we thought it best to inform you of the laws of the land/water. Here are some BOAT CRIMES for which you could be arrested. If found guilty by a boatload of your peers, the punishment for all of the following offenses is boat execution.
- Impersonating a Boat
- Murder in the Boat Degree
- Boatnapping
- Napping in a Boat
- Grand Boat Auto
- Reckless Floating
- Manslaughter with a Boat
- Boatslaughter
- Manboat
- Boat Trafficking
- Jayswimming
- Using Counterfeit Money to Pay a Hooker to Commit Perjury … on a Boat.
- Phishing
- Schooner Molestation
- Fishing
That’s the list. Everything else you can think of is perfectly legal.